!!!!
God, I hate video game related webcomics. They always follow the same formula:
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
DUKE
Duke who?
DUKE NUKEM FOREVER more like DUKE NUKEM FOREVER NOT GOING TO COME OUT AMIRIGHT?
Audience: My tiny monkey-brain sees that one of the several things in its database has been referenced. In this painfully drab nothingness, a never ending sea of complete banality that is my life, I will take ANYTHING as a life raft to help me stay afloat! SYCOPHANT MODE ACTIVATED. Man, that sure is true HAHAHA LOL XD THUMBS UP FOR GREAT JUSTICE INTERNETS HANDED AT YOU, SIR WELL PLAYED SYCOPHANT SYCOPHANT SYCOPHANT SYCOPHANT
The most exciting and inspiring thing these people have seen is that one episode of The Golden Girls where they were old and talked about men. That and when their friend, Jimmy, accidentally spilled ketchup on their pants! XD lol exclamations!
I realize I'm not exactly bridging that gap between "them" and "us." I'm not really trying to. That'll be for another day. Let's first identify and document the problem.
Growing up watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 made me a sucker for pain. I revel in it! So let's do that.
Check out these great failures!
Link to sunday wecomic featured on Kotaku.
Two GAMER friends in some kind of green egg purgatory expose their hairy, bulging, sloshing with MOUNTAIN DEW GAMER FUEL bellies seemingly in protest of the scenery around them whilst desperately staving off their raging love for one another. Because they are more than likely, bros 4 life. But then, the unthinkable happens ...
HAHAHAHA! GET IT!? A truly awe-inspiring twist if I've ever seen one! Could his friend really be the pope? Oh, red-hair-and-goatee-guy. When will you learn?
Another
HAH! BIG MAN USUALLY THINK OF SMASHING ROCKS. BUT NOW BIG MAN THINK OF PUBLIC IMAGE. HILARITY!
Boy, am I glad that blue guy is down there in the corner, though! Were he not there letting me know that I'm supposed to laff by making that comically exaggerated face of disdain for the situation at hand, I would have been genuinely concerned whether or not BIG MAN'S WHATEVER-HE'S-TALKING-ABOUT MAKES HIS BUTT LOOK BIG. Thanks, blue guy!
More
In this one we really take a look into our own souls and our relations to certain given facts. Is an arm really an arm? Is a goat really an animal? Does a shoe really protect our feet? Is the purpose of art to entertain? Does a video game store sell video games? All of these questions are answered, my friends. You have been enlightened. These guys are really operating on a different wavelength, man. I don't know what that wavelength is, or if it's any good. I don't know where they're going with this, but they're on some kind of wavelength. That's for sure.
CAD
MAN LIKE WOMAN, HARR HARR HARR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rooster Teeth
TRIPLE-DOG-FIST-OF-WOMAN-BURN!!!!
ALSO MORE MAN LIKE WOMAN! ETERNAL TRUTH. UG CLIMB TREE.
Ugh. Brain can't take it anymore. I'm sorry this came out a little disjointed and odd here and there. It really was a struggle to keep my head together through all this. I mean, come on! You saw 'em!
Stuff Things and Everything
15 years ago
Epitome of bad comics are found right in those 5 comics presented. This is evidence against us people who like games and play them for FUN (a term no longer familiar to "ELITE GAMERZ") and stereotypes us. Fantastic.
ReplyDeleteI like how these comic magicians, sometimes, try to fight against the "Gamer" stereotype by providing our attackers with proof and evidence for their assumptions.
and now........... the bryden take of each of these comics.
ReplyDelete#1 - after looking at the comic, then reading the first panel and first word of the second panel (YEEES) i found myself in some kind of trance for a full minute just repeating "really...? /reeeeally/... really now, really? /REALLY!?!/" for the reasons mentioned. also noted is the punchline that make little sence because the sarcasm was "noted" in the third panel. Also, videya nerds in a mountain meadow, looking at clouds go by- even if these kind of people live next door to such a thing, i highly doubt that doing this activity would ever crossed there minds...unless they were high...
#2 - thank you for explaining this joke, for some reason, Sroas did not register as a name for me and the comic look like it was ether german or gibberish (like there's a difference M I RITE?)
#3 - the only way this could possibly pass as a joke is if the clerk had down syndrome, and even then... the writer would need the same excuse...
#4 - Oh CAD, it's like your comics are an abortion in videya comic form (or miscarriage... w/e...)
#5 - "oh my! we're burlesque dancers but we are all covering our tits!" at first glance... i thought the dude was in Thailand. is it really still such a taboo to show a little nip? anyway, this was the least painful of the bunch, mainly because the joke was similar to that of a standard sitcom joke, not terrible but in no way good.
P.S. WHY CANT I USE SPELL CHEQUE? I'M USEING FIREFOX! and for the "brien" name thing, Gmail is my throw away e-mail cuz i could not post otherwise.